How Do You Know if You’re Ready To Get A Dog? –
So you want a dog. I get it! Dogs are the best thing on the planet, as they are pure love and goodness. For a long time I wasn’t ready for the intense commitment of getting a dog, but I’ve now been a dog owner for about six months and it has freakin changed my life, y’all. I want everyone to have a dog… but only if they treat that dog the way they deserve. Here’s how to know if you’re ready to have a dog.
1. Are you ready to leave the party early to go walk your dog?
No? Then you’re not ready to have a dog. You can’t just leave the house for 12 hours with nobody to let them out. You can’t be gone all day long and not spend time with them. If you aren’t willing to make sure your dog gets to go out and pee every 5 hours or so, you aren’t ready to have a dog. Maybe you can get a cat instead? They pee inside.
2. Can you afford a dog?
Dogs can be expensive. There’s the cost of dog food, and you really shouldn’t be getting the cheap stuff — it’s basically leftover nasty crap from slaughterhouses all ground up and mixed with cheap corn and chemicals. Don’t make your dog eat that. But what’s even more expensive are the vet visits, because sometimes your dog will get sick and need medical care. You might need to hire dog walkers or dog sitters sometimes if you go out of town or have a long day. If you can’t afford that, you aren’t ready to have a dog! Sorry. Get a Furby instead. They’re only $30.
3. Are you planning to adopt a dog and immediately spay or neuter it?
If no, then you aren’t ready to have a dog. There are so many dogs out there who need good homes, and dogs who are being put to death every day because they don’t have one. If you don’t love dogs so much that you want to save one — and then immediately spay or neuter it to make sure more homeless dogs don’t enter the world — then you don’t love dogs enough to have one.
4. Are you ready to pick up your dog’s poop?
Listen, it sucks, but you have to do it. Don’t be one of those people who leaves their dog’s crap on the sidewalk. People who do that go to hell.
5. Are you ready to love a dog like your own biological child?
Because that’s the deal. Your dog is your baby. You are your dog’s parent, its caretaker, its protector, its best friend — you are everything in the world to your dog.
6. Are you just getting a dog because it’s cute?
Yes, dogs are cute, but they’re so much more than that. And puppies are cute, but they’re a thousand times more work than an adult dog. There’s no worse person than someone who gets a puppy because they’re cute and gets rid of it as an adult. Don’t be that person. If you do that, may god have mercy on you for your lack of a soul.
Dogs are a ton of responsibility, but if you’re ready and able to handle it, having a dog is the best thing in the world. You get the love and companionship of the greatest living being on the planet and it’s so worth it. So are you ready to get a dog?